My childhood was emotionally turbulent for two profound reasons: my father was an undiagnosed and untreated bipolar individual, institutionalized multiple times for shock therapy, and my mother had endured devastating losses—her father’s suicide, being jilted by her fiancé weeks before her wedding, and losing her first baby at just three days old.
In our household, emotions weren’t safe. Around age ten, I learned to believe my mother when she said, “You don’t feel that way!” I became the protector—shielding her from emotions, primarily mine, and those of my two siblings as well.
A Mother’s Crisis, A Daughter’s Awakening
At 18, just months into college, my 49-year-old mother had a heart attack in January—proof that I had been protecting her well. With me gone, she had no one. Yet her recovery sparked a complete transformation. Meanwhile, I fell apart but managed to stagger through graduation with a major in physical therapy, throwing away everything I once believed was important: tournament tennis, skiing, Christianity, and my childhood dream of becoming a pediatrician—a dream my family and society had told me women couldn’t or shouldn’t pursue.
The Calling That Changed Everything
I created a back injury and used bodily pain to seek comfort and caring from others. I began work as a physical therapist, but my desire to become a physician was a true “calling”—far greater than any childhood dream. Against great odds, I accomplished this goal.
Then in 1974, when I was 33, my father died. I began to fall apart again.
Fortunately, at that time, I discovered MMS and began my own transformation journey.
Who I’ve Become
Looking back on who I am today, I’ve developed a profound capacity for empathy and compassion—though I admit these qualities come more easily with my patients and my dogs than in my personal relationships. I’ve had Samoyeds for over 50 years, and several have been master therapy dogs. They’ve taught me more than I could have imagined. I’ve also managed to sustain a stable relationship for over 40 years.
A Philosophy for Living
MMS taught me a way of viewing life that works beautifully for me. I first discovered it in emergency medical situations, but I’ve found it invaluable for life in general:
In the moment, I choose an action based on all the information available to me at that moment.
When we don’t get the result we wanted or expected, we are in a new moment.
I don’t chastise myself for the choice I made. I simply move on. In the next moment, I choose an action based on all the information that is now available to me in that new moment.
Such a simple way to live life.
Deep Gratitude
My deep heartfelt gratitude to Chérie and MMS for all you have done to enable me to become who I am and was always meant to be. I love my life, and I have the balance, peace, and fulfillment I used to yearn for.
Dr. Jan Young is a physician and MMS graduate who has transformed personal adversity into a life of purpose, compassion, and presence. Her journey exemplifies the power of Pure Coaching to heal, transform, and unlock human potential.